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Amanda Serna's Commitment & Attraction Advice Articles

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ATTRACTION AND COMMITMENT

8 Methods to Hook ‘Em and Keep ‘Em!

Posted on October 18, 2022

Ever wondered what exactly keeps a guy interested in a woman? You’ve met a guy, and you really like him. You don’t have any trouble piquing a guy’s curiosity… However, keeping his interest is a different matter. They fall hard time and time again, but they never stay down. If this is you, then you’re also constantly wondering whether you’re doing something wrong. 

As a woman with a somewhat successful relationship, I constantly get inquiries from women asking about “strategies” or “rules” for keeping a guy engaged. However, falling in love isn’t like playing a game of tennis 🎾.

Relationships are more likely to endure if they begin in a healthy environment where both parties are emotionally stable, have similar goals, and share similar values. It’s unlikely to succeed if the basis is weak. At the end of the day, no number of rules will change the fact that if you are fundamentally incompatible or not on the same wavelength, it just won’t work out.

How else do you keep him interested? To preserve his interest in you and prevent your relationship from being stale, relationship experts from all over the world agree on the following points:

It starts with your self-confidence

It all begins at home. So begin by loving and appreciating yourself. Have and communicate your thoughts, be self-assured, and take the initiative. Once your perspective on loving yourself is clear, you’ll be able to strike a balance: you’ll be open and delighted to receive his support, love, and attention, but you won’t expect him to provide all of it.

You’ll be happy inside and satisfied with who you are. However, it will be one of the qualities that will keep him drawn to you. You’ll experience a warm, safe, and welcoming environment.

When you love yourself, you are completely authentic and prepared to receive greater love from him as well.

Don’t make it an unhealthy competition

Granted, some level of competition between partners is often considered healthy. When does it become unhealthy?

He won’t fall in love with you if you are the CEO and founder of the trendiest cupcake company because your success or bank account is greater than his. If you’re a smart cookie, you should definitely embrace that trait and let it shine, but you don’t have to blow him away with your intellectual prowess.

Show that you’re interested in his interests.

Men are drawn to women who are interested in getting to know them, see them for who they are, and truly value them. Showing genuine interest in his interests is one simple method to win him over. 

He wouldn’t expect you to share his passions, so you don’t have to. However, a man enjoys being able to discuss his interests with a lady who shares them.

Ask him about his interests, pay close attention to his answers, and then really listen. It could be something as basic as knowing his favorite band or watching his favorite movie together.

Remember, men occasionally need their space 🪃

Women get messed up by this all the time. When everything seems to be going well when you’re seeing a guy, all of a sudden, he stops being as interested or attentive. Simply put, he doesn’t appear as thrilled by your existence as he was at first. It is possible that he has lost interest? 

But what if you consider another option? Maybe he simply needs a little breathing room. And that’s totally OK. Men are like rubberbands, they take space and then run back to you.

Fear is primarily brought on by insecurity. You become concerned and assume a guy is losing interest the moment he steps back. When you never lost him in the first place, you are now on a desperate mission to gain him back.

It’s typical for guys to cyclically seek space (even in the best of relationships and marriages), so it’s really nothing to worry about. When you can’t manage it and smother him to regain his interest, it becomes a serious problem. At that point, he genuinely begins to grow disinterested and reconsider the connection. 

Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Have a life outside your romantic relationships

Remember your friends. Sometimes when love is in the air, you forget about the people who have always stood by your side. 

It’s not necessary to spend every day with your new partner. You can spend Friday with him and Saturday with your girlfriends.

Your lives will intertwine the more your relationship develops, but it’s crucial to also have that separate time since it makes getting back together more thrilling. This also allows you to infuse happiness into the relationship rather than take it away, which is a mistake many women make.

In actuality, being intriguing is the best way to keep a guy engaged. Having a diverse range of hobbies is the best way to stand out from the crowd and make you a 💎gem in a man’s eyes.

Avoid mind games 🧠🎮

I said it once, and I’m definitely going to say it a couple more times; games will only ever get you games, not the real deal.
If he’s the “one’, he’ll stay because of your sincerity, honesty, and goodness. If real is what you’re after, stay away from games at all costs.
With care and sincerity, you keep his interest. Once you decide that’s what you want for yourself, pure intentions are exactly what you’ll draw

Stay mysterious and keep some things to yourself

You don’t have to go into great detail about how much fun you had on your student exchange to Mexico in the summer of 1999. However, you might express to him your excitement about your future plans.
Dating is about establishing a deeper connection with a man rather than trying to educate him. If you’re all about brains and no heart, that’s exactly how he will mirror you.

Have fun! 🤸‍♀️

When it comes to relationships, we put entirely too much pressure on ourselves. It makes sense since there are strong emotional stakes. Because you don’t want to get wounded, you try to keep yourself safe by determining—or making an attempt to determine—exactly where he stands, so you won’t be taken by surprise. Even though you enjoy spending time with him, you find it difficult to unwind because you are afraid he may grow bored and leave. Well, this attitude could very well be the reason why.
Rest easy and enjoy yourself! Avoid bringing out all of your vulnerabilities, childhood traumas, and broken heartbreaks. Try your best to just start over, get to know him, and have fun with him. That is the purpose of dating! It’s an adventure, not a way to affirm your own worth.
Let’s face it; if a man DOES lose interest in you, there’s always a reason. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you had a hand in it, but following through with these tips can reduce the chances of that happening again in the future. If you stick around and sign up for my newsletter, you’ll get to learn more about keeping men interested as well us:
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How To Make Men Chase You