Amanda Serna's Self Love & Self Care Advice Articles

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How to Build the Ultimate Self-Care Routine

Posted on November 15, 2022

arial shot of woman in bathtub doing her selfcare routine by reading a book

Why Your Self Care Routine Sucks 🙅‍♀️

Bold title right? I want to get your attention so you STOP your mediocre self-care routine and START doing self-care that will actually change your life.

Self-care became “all the rage” this past decade and has included everything from refusing to work past a 5pm work day to ‘treat yo’ self’ T-shirt wearing girls gangs who indulge in a weekend of shopping and cupcakes. 

While it has become over commercialized and trivialized, overall I believe the movement is long overdue in our modern era where women are expected to do more work for less compensation. The Self-Care Movement forced women to begin rebuilding boundaries to protect ourselves from those that would drain us dry and then peer over our dead bodies and still say we “didn’t do enough.”

However, I believe that the pendulum swung in to an unproductive trajectory when the commercialization of self-care began. In line the American consumerist, individualist culture, this new media message made us believe that that ‘self-care’ was buying things and retreating from people. 

And then we wonder why we still feel so tired and not enough even after buying those $5 jelly face masks or spending $80 on a massage.

The key to success with your Self-Care practice is two-fold.

(1) You MUST find out what works for YOU. Maybe it’s a long walk in the woods or going to a boxing class. Maybe it’s drinking matcha or drinking coffee.

(2) What gets measured, get’s managed and DONE. Tracking your self-care is only way to commit to it. And committing is the only way to receive the benefits of having the self-care routine. It is a p-r-a-c-t-i-c-e.

You are the expert on taking care of yourself 💆‍♀️

The truth is, that when it comes to self-care, there is no one shoe fits all.

Some of us are extroverts and we recharge our battery from being in commit with people. Others are introverts and obtain peace from sitting alone with a good book.

Some of feel at peace after a great workout. Others of us would rather gouge our own eyes out rather than sit our ass on a thin Spin class seat that shaves down sit bones down to dust.

Real self-care is about finding out what PLAY is for you.

Play can be defined as an activity we enjoy so much that when we do it, we lose track of time and space.

Set a reminder in your phone that reads as follows: I play + have fun. 🎉😁🤸‍♀️ 

You are more than welcome to copy and past it. Make sure the reminder is set to every day.

My Personal Self Care Practice 🧖‍♀️

Below is a list of my real self care practices that I can actually feel restore me.

  • Barefoot walk through a garden
  • Cool lavender or eucalyptus towels
  • Long hot baths with candles
  • Sweaty, hot yoga class
  • Hot jasmine tea and journaling
  • A talk with a great friend

Real Self-Care doesn't need to cost you anything at all. 🧘‍♀️

Not everyone can afford to get a massage every week or buy themselves flowers and candles for a romantic bath, but your imagination is just as good. Studies repeatedly show that imagination is just as effective as the real thing. Spending five minutes to meditate and imagine self-care will relax your nervous system to get you out of fight or flight mode.

It takes time to become vulnerable to learn about someone. It requires trust, which can only be developed through time and in many contexts. He should earn the right to hear your story. What we earn, we value.🏆

Method Practice from my Book: Curing Self-Love Practices

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